A Comedy of Errors…and other Corruption Tales

I am continually reading and hearing about corruption in Afghanistan and how it is holding the country back. But sometimes, it lands right on my doorstep. This happened just recently when we were given two notes, one day after the other by the Police guards on our street.

One, on official headed paper said (paraphrased):

‘There has been a new commander appointed to oversee the Police in your area. His name is xxx and he is paid by the Government, please do not pay him ‘backsheesh’ (the slang for bribes)’

The other was a hand-written note which simply said:

‘I am the new commander of the Police in this District. Please contact me to arrange ‘backsheesh’ payment as soon as possible.’

Personally, I thought this was wonderful and suggested a simple switch of the papers should clear up the problem – the official note to the Governor handed to the Commander and the handwritten note back to the Government should clear things up.

Perhaps learning from their commander, these guards are continually asking for things – pots, kettles, chairs, coats etc. Often, knowing that they don’t have the best job or a great salary we do what we can to help. But recently, we really were aware of how much we were being taken for a ride. Having bought them chairs a few months ago, then replaced one a month later they suddenly announced they needed new ones again,

“But what happened to the ones you had?”

“They were stolen” they told us with not a hint of irony or a smile. These guys work as a team of four so that they can provide 24-7 guarding, one on duty, one asleep and two actively guarding. And so the thought that they weren’t even capable of guarding their own plastic chairs did not exactly fill us with reassurance.

However, it was soon revealed that this was not actually a true representation of events. It turns out that their commander had actually taken their chairs, since it was in fact against their rules to be sitting down when they were on active guard duty….perhaps he is trying to prove that he is earning his backsheesh after all.

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